Moonstalker sat at his police desk with a cup of hot chocolate.  
He was still in his uniform, even though his shift had ended hours 
ago.  He was grinning from ear to ear.  On any wolf's features, such a 
smile was spooky to look at.  Everyone around him knew that look 
well, and knew that they had very good reason to be alarmed.  They 
checked their desks nervously, and studied every drawer for 
tampering before opening it.  They smelled the water from the water 
faucet, and had the bomb squad examine the toilets.  They called 
personell to check the status of their health insurance, and threw 
their lunches away.

	That particular smile meant that Moonstalker had set up 
another one of his jokes again.

	Not that his pranks were ever intended to be harmful or cruel.  
Moonstalker didn't want to hurt anyone.  They were just mischievous 
and clever.  Sometimes too clever for Moonstalker's own good.  Sgt 
Veritas, a fox from Data processing, swore up and down that no wolf 
could be that smart.  Veritas insisted that Moonstalker was just a 
very large grey fox with a speech impediment rather than a grey 
wolf with a badge.  

	Well, that would teach the fox to leave donuts on his desk 
without watching them.  Besides, the ExLax wasn't harmful, and they 
were chocolate covered donuts to begin with...

	Or was that the time he put the Fur remover in the lavoratory 
soap dispenser downstairs?  He couldn't remember.  

	And now, he was showing the tell-tale signs of another gag in 
progress.  The otters, lions, and bears that worked around him 
suddenly found excuses to be in safer areas, like a gang war 
downtown.  The room was getting emptier by the moment as one by 
one they became aware of his grin and headed for the hills.  At the 
moment, only 8 or 9 other officers were still at there desks, too 
caught up in their work to realize what was happening.

	"MOONSTALKER!" his boss roared from his office, in a voice that 
shook the windows.  "GET IN HERE!"

	He set down his drink. Suppressing the grin with a well 
practiced poker face, he got up from his typewriter and walked 
around his desk to the closed office door.  On the glass in black 
lettering was the name Capt Flat.  He politely knocked on it.

	"NOW OFFICER!" the voice roared.  Well, Moonstalker thought, I 
guess that is as nice an invitation as I am going to get.

	He opened the door and went into the small cluttered office.  Or 
what should have been a cluttered office.  Right now, the large 
overweight uniformed warthog was sitting in his chair with his arms 
crossed, and no desk was there in front of him.  The room was empty 
except for the file cabinet, the chair, the captain, and sergeant 
Moonstalker.

	"Care to explain the meaning of this?" Captain Flat asked.

	Moonstalker didn't let on.  "Explain what sir?"

	Captain Flat pointed up to the ceiling.  Moonstalker looked.  
There mounted to the ceiling somehow, was the captain's desk, along 
with the captain's phone, lamp, photos, in and out basket, and all the 
papers on the desk.  Even the trashcan, complete with trash.  All 
upside down on the ceiling, seeming to defy gravity.

	Moonstalker held his poker face, but it was a struggle not to 
laugh.  "Doing some redecorating sir?" he remarked.  "I think next to 
the window would be much nicer."

	Captain Flat was not smiling.  In fact, if there was such a thing 
as an anti-smile, he was wearing it.  "Officer, if you have this much 
free time, I can find you something to do." he grunted.  "Perhaps 
something in the vultures section of town with a piece of meat on 
your hat?"

	"Me Captain?" Moonstalker tried to look surprised.  "What 
makes you think I had anything to do with this?"

	"The locker room incident makes you suspect number one." the 
captain grunted.

	"Surely you don't think I would do such a thing to my most 
respected superior?"

	"Can it officer!" the warthog shot back.  "I can always get the 
tapes from the monitor cameras if I need to."

	Damn, Moonstalker thought.  I forgot to knock out the camera 
first.  Oh well.	"Okay then captain" Moonstalker said, finally giving 
up and grinning.  "Consider this a last gag before your immenent 
marriage.  It is your last big laugh before your life becomes one of 
endless drudgery."

	Captain Flat looked up again at the ceiling at his desk.  Pointing 
at the upside down coffee cup on his upside down desk, the captain 
asked "You mean to tell me, that this is your idea of a wedding gift?"

	"Actually, yes.  Now you won't spend so much time at the 
office."

	"And how exactly did you get the coffee to stay in the upside 
down cup?"

	Moonstalker's grin grew larger.  "Sorry, trade secret." he 
replied. "But I don't advise you try to drink it."

	"Why didn't you just chain all the furniture to my body during 
my nap?" the warthog huffed angrily.

	"Because then I would have to arrest you for impersonating an 
office, sir."

	That did it!  That was Captain Flat's last straw.  He jumped out 
of his chair and stood nose to nose with his young lupine sergeant.  "I 
have just about had it with you and your pranks Moonstalker!" he 
yelled.  "It wasn't bad enough that you pull these jokes on the other 
officers, and now on me, but you had to go and pull a stunt on the 
mayor too!"

	Moonstalker dropped his smile.  He remembered that.  It 
wasn't a pretty sight.  But he had not targetted the mayor.  It had 
just so happened that the ox got in the way.  Moonstalker had 
sprayed glue in the men's restroom not knowing that the mayor was 
going to pay a visit.  The Ox went into the stall wearing pants...

	and came out wearing a commode seat.  The photos were in the 
papers for weeks.

	The mayor's approval ratings jumped 20 points.  It saved his 
election.  The flyers for his campaign said "Re-elect the mayor! He 
doesn't take any Crap!"  A funny world, politics.

	But right now his boss was right in his face, and not at all 
happy.  "How the heck am I supposed to do my job now officer?" he 
yelled.  "My desk and my papers are stuck to the ceiling!  And how 
the heck did you do this to begin with, so I can get someone busy 
undoing it?"

	"The desk is mounted to the ceiling with aircraft wire," 
Moonstalker began, "and all the rest is held up with this."  He 
reached into his pocket and pulled out a small gray can.  "This is the 
latest thing from Acme: super glue in a spray can.  It is really 
amazing stuff.  See, by adjusting this nozzle..."

	He didn't get to finish.  "So you are telling me, that on top of my 
desk being on top of my office, all my things are glued to it as well?"

	"Well, yeah." Moonstalker replied.  "How else do you think I 
could have pulled this off?"

	"All the important papers as well?"  He looked about ready to 
burst a vein.

	Moonstalker nodded.

	Just then the phone began to ring.  Captain Flat reached 
upwards to try to pull the reciever down to him.  He couldn't get it to 
budge.  The phone was securely glued to it's hook, which was 
securely glued to the desk.  The warthog pulled down and tugged at 
it for several rings, then turned to the wolf and said,  "And what if 
that is my fiance on the phone right now? "

	"You could tell her that you were stuck at the office?"  
Moonstalker grinned again.  

	The phone stopped ringing.

	Captain Flat didn't lose his temper.  He didn't even turn red like 
he normally did.  Instead, the warthog simply reached into his front 
left pocket, pulled out some folded pieces of paper and handed them 
to Moonstalker.  "Here officer.  Take these." the captain quietly said.

	"What is this?" Moonstalker asked, taking the papers and 
starting to unfold them.

	"Those are your reassignment papers." the captain replied.  "I 
am sending you away, far away, to investigate an art theft and 
forgery ring on Furrymuck."

	Moonstalker stopped unfolding and looked aghast.  
"Furrymuck?" he stammered.  "Why not just send me to a circus?  
Don't you know how weird they are out there, at the edges of 
civilized space?  Besides, I didn't even know that was in our 
jurisdiction!"

	"Oh it is in our jurisdiction all right, when the mob is involved." 
the captain explained.  "There have been numerous robberies from 
the famed Avatar art museum there.  We think the raccoon mob is 
responsible."

	"What makes you think that?" Moonstalker asked without 
thinking.

	The captain stared at him with a steely gaze.  "Because the art 
that was stolen turned up here, in the form of about 100 forgeries!  
People thought they were buying valuable pieces, but were only 
getting fakes.  Since this would not be the first time the raccoon mob 
has gotten into forgery, they are the prime suspects."

	The captain poked him in the chest with a finger.  It wasn't a 
nice finger.  "And you, Moonstalker, have just won the lottery and 
are going to Furrymuck within the hour!  I was going to send Louis, 
but you seem to be so eager and full of energy that I think I will 
send you instead!"

	Moonstalker stood in shocked silence.  Furrymuck?  He was 
being sent to the edge of known space?  "How am I getting there?" 
Moonstalker asked.

	"A Lanthide class starship is heading out that way tonight.  
They are holding up in orbit and are waiting for you.  They will drop 
you off in their shuttle before heading out of known space and onto 
their assigned research mission."

	"Dropped off?!" Moonstalker yelled.  "You mean I am being 
dumped there, and then have no way to return?! How in the worlds 
am I going to get back?!  And when?!"

	The captain smiled.  "You can come back when your 
investigation is done."  The warthog slowly settled back down into 
his chair, smiling.  "And don't worry about it.  I am sure a clever wolf 
like you will think of a way to get home when the assignment is 
over."  

	"Captain," the wolf began to grovel "you can't be serious.  I 
mean, Furrymuck is the edge of known space, and they are widely 
known for their bizarre behavior!  Is this just my punishment for 
playing a joke on you?  Even one that maybe, maybe went a little too 
far?"

	Turning around in the chair Captain Flat said "I have to send 
someone, and you are one of my best." He stared out the window 
with his back to the wolf.  "A world class pain in the ass, but you are 
still one of my best.  I know that you will crack the case, eventually.  
And this way I get a little peace and quiet for a while as a bonus.  
Everything you need to know is in those papers.  Dismissed."

	Moonstalker looked dejectedly at his boss's back.  "As you wish 
sir.  But captain, if this is in fact in response to my little joke?"

	"Yes?" the warthog prompted him.

	"You might want to stay out of your center drawer."

	The phone began to ring again as Moonstalker made his way 
out the door of the captains office.  Moonstalker walked away, but 
could hear the warthog complaining as he tried and tried to get the 
phone off its hook.   The wolf grabbed his chocolate as he walked by 
his desk and looked at the papers he had been given.  Everything 
was there all right: flight times for the starship, address of a local 
detective agency that would assist him, even contact names.  
Zero_wolfe and Shockwave, a pair of wolves from the agency... what 
disreputable names, he thought.

	He glanced backwards as he left the office to see Captain Flat 
gritting his teeth hanging upside down on the phone receiver, and 
pulling for all he was worth.  It would serve him right if the glue 
gave way just then.  Suddenly it did, and the warthog answered the 
phone with a loud thud.  But not as loud as the cursing that followed.  
The entire floor reverberated with the warthog's obscene references 
to Moonstalker, his family, his pets...  Perhaps things would be better 
if I left early, Moonstalker thought, and he ran quickly down the 
stairs.